Saturday, December 15, 2007

Chemical

My beta was 13.2. Dammit, that's not what I was expecting. I feel like I'd rather have a flat out negative. But oh, well. Now I simply need to be bothered to go in for another damn blood test on Tuesday morning. I also drank 2 margaritas last night and got pretty happy. I'm sure it doesn't matter, but it makes me freak out a little none-the-less.

So, this is something that is a first on our journey. Something new. A chemical pregnancy. I just hope it's below 5 on Tuesday. Maybe that's why they're having me come in on Tuesday, in the hopes that I won't have to come back if on Monday it's still over 5. Sigh. 13.2.

13 comments:

Waiting Amy said...

Rachel I'm so sorry. You don't deserve any more torment.

Hoping you're feeling better soon.

Carey said...

Damn... I hate chemicals. I am sorry you are having to go through this.

ultimatejourney said...

Crap. I'm really sorry.

Anonymous said...

woah! as you say, not expected and, I agree, harder to deal with in some ways than a flat out negative. But... if there is any positive to be had out of this I guess it bodes better for the future in that the new sperm can fertilise your eggs. Also, although having a forced break because of the insurance etc is frustrating maybe, a break from all the drugs, will be a good thing and will allow the perfect egg/s to come forward when you try next year. I'm hoping for you that this is the beginning of the end of this horrible journey and that next time will be the start of all things good that you deserve.

Clare

Natalie said...

Damnit. :( I'm sorry.

My Reality said...

I am sorry, Rachel. I think a chemical is worse than a negative.

Nearlydawn said...

Damn it, Rachel! You have just gotten no good news this year. I am so sorry you keep having to deal with all this crap. I was so hoping it would be easy for you guys once you started with the donor sperm. Geeesh, IF really isn't fair.

I hope that your next test shows below 5 and you can start next year off on the right foot.

CrystalnMelanie said...

So Srry to hear this news! The New Year will be it!!! And the other poster is right, now you know this donor will work.

Susan said...

I'm sorry. I was so hoping for good news. Better things are to come. I can just feel it.

The Town Criers said...

I'm sorry--that really really really sucks. Thinking about you, sweetie.

maryellenandsteve said...

Crap. I am so sorry.

Samantha said...

I've been there. Sorry you're in chemical limbo.

infertility just sucks said...

F.

This stinks. I'm really sorry.