Spilled the beans

One of the women I work with is a counselor. I had mentioned we were planning to have dinner with my friend S this weekend, and she asked me if S was married. I said yes, and this launched into a discussion of friends who were married and how early or late people got married. This made me think of Margo because we had a similar discussion. Where she is from, people tend to get married and have kids early.

This lead to a discussion about T's bt. She mentioned her sister-in-law had a miscarriage while on vacation. Then, of course, I had to mention my most recent miscarriage in Mexico. I said, 'I had my most recent miscarriage while on vacation,' and she said, 'Most recent?' So I sort of spilled the beans about everything. I told her I had three. She was amazed. I told her about IVF with PGD. I told her I was going to do it (but didn't say exactly when). She said she's a counselor and used to keeping things confidential.

I just can't not talk about this. I just can't keep things inside. If asked, I'm going to spill the beans. I try like hell to shut myself off, but I can't. I need to tell people things. I think it will be okay, and I was sort of planning on bringing it up with my boss at some point, but the cat's out of the bag now.

I hope I don't worry about this. I don't think I will. But I'm spilling my story, slowly, at work.