Tomorrow is my last day of work before leaving. I have so much crap to do and I don't know when I'm going to do it. I'm going to try to leave work early tomorrow so I can do things. Tonight we each have plans with friends and will not get anything done. Oy!
T still hasn't finished his autobiography and I am requiring we mail it in on Friday. I have no idea how he's going to finish it. I am very upset about it right now, but he still says he'll get it done. We cannot talk about it without him getting frustrated, and we can talk about anything. We never argue or even get that annoyed with each other, so it feels so weird to have this albatross around our necks. I want him to finish it so we can just mail the damn thing in and get that part over with. We still have a bunch more big hurdles before the waiting just starts.
I have decided to give up giving up stuff. I'm drinking caffeine. I'm drinking alcohol. I've stopped my prenatal. Yes, we have two more vials of donor sperm, but I'm just sick of doing things that indicate I have some sort of hope. I have no hope. I will never get pregnant and have a child. It's just not in the cards for us. If a miracle happened, I'll start taking precautions then. Worse things have happened. Fuck it.
I'm trying to not stress. Our vacation should hopefully be relaxing. But I'm not quite there yet.
I probably won't blog from the road, so I'll not be back until after July 1. I'm sure nobody cares, really, but I just wanted to put it out there.
Have a great couple of weeks.