Monday, December 15, 2008

Rainy days and Mondays

Today was better than last week. Nobody really yelled at me on the phone.

This weekend was pretty good in terms of the things we did. We went out for some nice Ethiopian food and had a cupcake from one of those trendy cupcake places that keep cropping up. We also went to one of our niece's 11th birthday party. I made a hat and mittens for her, and she was pleased with them.

I got some bad news from some friends, too. I found out one friend has separated from her husband, and another got some bad infertility news. The one who is separated is sad, but seems to be doing okay. The fellow infertile isn't doing so well as she got the diagnosis that the chance of spontaneous conception was very, very low. Because it is secondary infertility, I think she feels like her sadness doesn't appreciate her kid enough or something. I don't know much about secondary infertility, but I do know it sucks. All infertility sucks.

It's so weird when these types of issues come into real life. I feel like I don't know how to comfort my friends. I send them emails or call them on the phone, but there is really nothing to do or say. It's all about listening and agreeing that it all sucks. But somehow that doesn't make anybody feel any better.

I don't know if I liked people talking to me when I got bad news or if I preferred to be left alone. I think I generally liked to be left alone, but I'm not really sure.

I just wish I could do more for them.

4 comments:

Almamay said...

Believe me when I say that listening to a friend and hating the thing that they hate (i.e. infertility) is a great help. Sometimes it's the best thing because advice isn't always what you want. Just support. You sound like you are a lovely friend.

Parenthood For Me said...

I agree- All infertility sucks- doesn't matter how or when you experience it.

Hi,
I am an adoptive mom who went through the infertility roller coaster. I recently started a not for profit,

http://www.parenthoodforme.org/

Our mission is to provide financial and emotional support to those starting families through adoption and medical intervention.
Please visit my website and pass the link on to your circle.
I appreciate the help.

Sincerely,
Erica Walther Schlaefer

astral said...

It does mean a lot to have someone to listen to you. Listening is a wonderful quality in a friend. I know my friends (none are infertiles) don't know what to say to me, but I appreciate that I can call them and they lend me a very supportive ear. I'm sorry about your friends' news.

beagle said...

I agree . . . being there to listen if they want to talk is the greatest gift.

From my snowy Wednesday . . . hope your week got better . . .