Bad day

Today is a bad day.

I have to do a volunteer shift at a co-operative play space we joined and I have no one to look after Henry when I'm working. My mom backed and and the neighbor who was going to help is way too sick to come. It will work out, but it's a bit of a pain. If this was my only issue, I'd get over it fast.

Bdog won't climb the back stairs any more. This means I have to walk him around front to get him back in the house. This creates a huge issue for his going out issues. He won't climb the inside stairs, either. I feel like I am doing Bdog a disservice and I feel like it's untenable for us to keep him. He needs a better home than we can provide for him. This is really depressing me.

H is having sleeping issues. He's waking up early(ish) in the morning (for him, and it interferes with Bdog's walk schedule) and his napping is being weird. It's only 2 days, but I'm concerned. He's never had sleeping issues before and he wouldn't go down for a nap quickly today or yesterday and he woke up in the middle of his nap today, but he did go back to sleep. Now I need to wake him up in 10 minutes so that I can make that shift at the play space.

I have 6 bags of leaves from the back yard waiting to be picked up by the town, but apparently no leaves are collected after December 11th in this town. So how I have 6 bags of leaves until April. I don't have any place to keep them until then. What am I supposed to do?

Writing this, it makes me wonder why I feel as distraught as I do, but I feel distraught. Maybe it's the Bdog thing. I really question my ability to care for him every single day. He is so attached to me, but he won't let anyone else care for him. I just don't know what to do now that it seems I can't simply let him out in the back yard. T doesn't really like Bdog anyway.

I just feel like crying. Today sucks.

Tomorrow morning I"m dropping H off at Grammie and Grampie's for 24 hours. We have T's office holiday party tomorrow night. I hope I can relax a little.