Information

We got some more health information about K. She is currently 16w6d along, meaning her due date is at the end of June. (We had originally been told the end of May.) She made it to her most recent doctor's appointment, which is good, since she had previously missed a couple. She is going to a perinatalogist due to her meth@d0ne treatment.

Feeling a little better about the sex of the baby. We've been talking names already, which might be dangerous. But we think we have one.

Henry has been sick a bunch and all the time I keep thinking that I'm glad I don't have to deal with an infant while dealing with all of this stuff. But I do want another infant. Sometimes I get scared of how much work it will be, but I still know this is what I want. I hope I am able to be flexible so that H can get all the activity he needs while the baby can still nap. I usually pick H up from school at 2pm. Will I not be able to do that next year?

The end of June seems a long, long way away. H will be done with school (and hopefully in some sort of summer program). My parents will have gone to Florida for two months and come back. I will have hosted our family Passover seder at our house. I will have turned 41.

But it will come and whether or not we bring that baby home, our lives will be forever changed.

More info

We got a call from the social worker who is working with K. We found out the baby is a boy. We also found out that she is possibly one month less pregnant than she originally thought.

So, to me, this is significant. Is the baby measuring really small and therefore not healthy? Or is paternity different from what she had originally reported?

This seems even more complicated than before.

Also, I'm feeling guilty that I am the tiniest bit disappointed that it's a boy. I would have loved to have a daughter too. I mean, I'm not so disappointed that I would ever change my mind about the match over the sex of the baby or anything. I really just want a healthy child. But I have to admit that I was a little bit hoping to have one of each. I feel terrible about that.

On a happier note, the social worker talked to K about openness and why it is good, and it seems she is thinking about accepting a little bit of openness. This definitely pleases me. I would like to have a little bit of openness in both of our adoptions.